Welcome again to the Wednesday Weekly Blogging Challenge, a year-long challenge set by the good folk at Long and Short Reviews that anyone can participate in. Check out the site to see who else is playing along.

This week’s topic:

Things I wish I was better at

This one is easy. Golf.

I’m a mad keen golfer but, with the exception of a purple patch several years ago, when the stars aligned and the Great Golfing God was smiling down on me and it seemed I could do no wrong, most of the time I’m just a hacker. And not a very good hacker either.

I blame this on four things.

First up, my dad. Yes, yes, I know this is mean but back when I was sixteen or so and showing a bit of an interest in the game he should have handed me straight to the club professional instead of trying to teach me himself. My dad, bless him, is an even worse golfer than me. This is not someone you should be learning from.

In fact, it was Dad who coined the much-uttered phrase “Us Heins weren’t meant to play golf”.

Secondly, my former hockey career hasn’t helped either.

Although, to be fair, if I’d taken golf lessons at an early age (see blame number one) this probably wouldn’t be an issue.

I played hockey back in the days when you weren’t allowed to lift the club beyond your shoulders in case you whacked someone in the head – an accident I’ve had happen to me and have the eyebrow scar for proof. Because of this ingrained training, I have no golf backswing. It’s more a truncated kind of hoist backwards followed by a hard swing forward and a lot of praying that the club and ball will actually connect. Which sometimes doesn’t happen.

Third, I have really crappy eyesight. Really, really crappy and made worse from illness over the last couple of years. It can be hard to concentrate on the ball when it’s a fuzzy thing at your feet, although fluoro yellow balls help. As for seeing where it lands… Most of the time I guess.

Fourth, I haven’t been playing enough. I used to play at least twice a week, when we lived in western Sydney. Then we moved to Newcastle in 2018 and life went a bit pear-shaped. We’d just started back playing golf after our move when I became ill and temporarily lost the sight in my left eye. It’s only in the last six months that I started playing again, and then lockdown happened. We were still allowed to play in New South Wales but as an at-risk person we decided it was better not to.

None of this has been any good for my game.

But there is light a-coming!

With Australia weathering the COVID-19 storm relatively well, golfing is back on the agenda. And, after being told for years and years I’m an unsuitable candidate, I’m finally getting eye surgery. Rah!

I won’t get all my eyesight back – there’s too much damage for that fairy-tale ending – but any improvement will be a major win.

So watch out golf course… I’m lining you up. It won’t be pretty, but it’ll be enthusiastic and joyful, and you can’t want for more than that.

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What do you wish you were better at?

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